Saturday, June 27, 2009

Chapters, Books and Screen Plays turning into Scripts

I'm trying to close a chapter in my life but hv no idea how to write the ending;
tbh im not even sure if i should end the chapter or just plainly end the book, to just let everything go. Start a new book and just play a new character.
All I know is - i want to start a fresh.
I want the excitement of life to come back to me.
I want to take off that old dirty mask and just leave it on the table and pile the new pretty yellow costumes ontop of it.
I want to leave the drama of the old book in the old book and never have to bring it up again.
I want the bring new friendship through the characters and dust off some of the old ones.
I want to project my best features and leave the horrible ones to be eaten by the mice backstage.
I want to go out there and show everyone the best that I can be.
But most of all I want to reflect the Son.
The main character in my script.
I pray He'll always be the main and never in the wings (unless he has a quick change XD)

and yes...i no my book has turned into a script but what can i say...I'm a performer ><

Signing out with theatrical blessings and cuddles xxx

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

20 things I learnt under the knife...

1. Ultrasounds are cooool!
2. It can be really hard to find a surgeon on a Friday night ><
3. "O.k you're going to feel a bit sleepy soon"
"how long will it take for me to feel...woooooo zzzzzzz"
4. Morphine is my friend ^^
5. I shiver frantically for an hr after surgery.
6. I realised why they ask so many questions before surgery.
7. Anestesia is not my friend ><
8. Learnt how it really feels to actually really throw up water xD
9. The gown they give you is actually quite comfy.
10. Drip = Bessie <3
11. 2 injections + 1 arm = MASSIVE YELLOW,GREEN & RED BRUISE ><
12. Pissing the food that Bessie gave me gives a smooth feeling.
13. We really use our abs more than we think.
14. I do not sleep well unless I'm on my side.
15. If you don't eat and keep your food, the hospital will not discharge you 0.o
16. My friends have officially seen me at my worst.
17. When something internally touches your abdominal area, your intestine's shut down.
18. They encourage you to fart after surgery xD
19. When you look dead and beaten up, your baby cousin will be scared of you ><
20. All that pain for a 5CM appendix ><

oh and...when they see free fluid running aorund in you abdomen...your screwed xD

Signing off with surgical cuddles and blessings!

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Yellow flowers and Blue rainbows

I'm sitting here,crouched.
NO! what did we say...postive things only...dont mention your pain ><
Fineeee, sitting here, listening to disney songs and realising that i have asolutely nothing to do.
What did i just say?
I have decided to try get my positiveness back and be me finding it kinda hard cos im used to d negativity..and feelign sorry for myself. *and zip-a-dee-doo-dah just came on xD*
But like I've realised that the more negative you are about the negative things going on in your life the worse your gonna make it you no?

-ve + -ve = double -vitiy
+ve + -ve= neautral action
so in actual fact its always better to try make soemthign positive even if you feel its impossible.
Now I started reading a book Steve gave me its bout positive thinking and I know that will get me back on track =) and look I'm already getting there..
I really wanna genuinely thank all of you from the bottom of my heart for keeping me in your prayers and wishing me better and coming to visit me and sending me sms or fb messages or phoning...anything and everything helped so much =) I am honestly truly grateful for my friends..and I must admit that even though my whole bday was a friends still managed to make it special and i am eternally grateful for ALL OF YOU!

Next blog will be all about my freaky experience in a hospital...i might just vlog it =P XD
IF..your lucky ;)

Signing out with massive individual cuddles, blessings and smushes! <3

Wednesday, June 10, 2009


No..I don't need special hugs. Tbh I don't really want hugs at all at the moment.
Wow, my Blog has completely turned pessimistic.
Hmph.. I think I've lost Kai.
Incedible, how since my Bday nothings really gone my way. the word I'd use to describe how I feel atm.
Interesting, is what you feel when you realise that you've put on a mask.
Sigh..there isn't much to undersatnd here.
Happiness, hasn't been in my vocab for a while now.

I don't really know what's wrong tbh I'm still trying to figure it out..

But till then...

I'm out